Last night my helplessness reach the max. Pear was sweating all over, trying to clear the lumps for several hours. It was Chinese Lunar New Year Day 2.
I reflected on the Three Sufferings I learned before.
Obvious physical pain
Pain of change – unpleasant & pleasant, like eating to fulfil my hunger makes me hungry again in afew hours
Pervasive – we are all dying, every every day, closer & closer
So pain is suffering, suffering is pain. Even nice pleasant things is ‘pain’
My thoughts were cut abruptly when Pear finally did a loud sigh “why can’t I just live normally? Why can’t the clog just give me a day off”
I was completely helpless. I suggested to go to 24hours NTUC to buy cabbage. As I walk I keep doing the Act of Truth (*source from The Diamond Cutter book)
By now, I can’t comprehend what level of psychological torture she has been enduring for countless days. We have decided to wean off and we thought it would get better but it did not and the lump this time is the WORST.
2am, a friend of us recommended a lady – Arline. We texted her and to our surprise, she will come first thing in the morning. Slight relive I felt, the Act of Truth is working!
When she came she settled the problem fast and was really efficient. She gave us some advise on weaning off. And encourage Pear to have a Last Latch today…
The day passed and we are ready for the Last Latch. Pear was so emotional and cried. My heart went out for her.
I sat her down …
We discuss about Letting It Go.
As parents, our roles are not to cling on to our child. We should be helping Kayzen to grow. Soon he will be a toddler, we help him to crawl, then to walk, run, jump, when he goes to school, he will meet friends whom will open up a whole new world for him. When he turns to an adult, he will be on his own. We as parents should not attempt to hold his life back. And today, we need to practice. It shall be our first assignment, to develop the habit to skillfully letting it go when the time comes. It may hurts but it is necessary and we are proud to be such cool parents, as now we will be focusing on the next thing for Kayzen.